Encouragement
After yesterday post on Courage, it got me thinking on the Western and Eastern way of encouraging people.
We Asian are more reserved and we always think about people around us to make sure we do not embarrass them or ourself by doing things that go against the social norm. When things go wrong, we start blaming people by telling them: "See, I told you so!, "Why are you so careless?", "You everytime like that one!" Yeah! Speaking of adding salt to the wound and rubbing it hard!!! And what happen after this? People step back and shy away from doing things because they are afraid if it fails again and that they have to put up with the wound-rubbing salt! And they become smaller and smaller, mentally!
The wester society, on the other hand is taking a different approach, they support their friends and family members in things they do (of course not criminal activities!) This is how people build confident, step forward and see the sunshine in their face. Be it they fail, the family and friends continue to be supportive, by giving word of encouragement like "It is ok! You are going to be fine next time." These word of loves, help them to stand up and continue to venture into the life journey.
Ok, so what is this have to do with the yesterday post? I remember one guy in the show said that his Mama encouraged him to go for the contest. You see, if this is in Asia, the Mama will be like, "You crazy-ah? Want to show your already embarrasing asset to embarrass youself more? No! No! You cannot go! Later you Uncle, Auntie and our neighbour know about it, I don't have face to go pasar (market) again!"
And then I remembered watching the interview on cable TV when I was in the States. The Playboy playmate was answering the interviewer question, saying that she wanted to give thanks to her Mom for giving her the support when she was doubting over whether or not to post nude for Playboy. And yes, that decision to be the playmate made her famous. Shall the Mom reacted like a asian Mom, she will not have been who she is today.
We Asian are more reserved and we always think about people around us to make sure we do not embarrass them or ourself by doing things that go against the social norm. When things go wrong, we start blaming people by telling them: "See, I told you so!, "Why are you so careless?", "You everytime like that one!" Yeah! Speaking of adding salt to the wound and rubbing it hard!!! And what happen after this? People step back and shy away from doing things because they are afraid if it fails again and that they have to put up with the wound-rubbing salt! And they become smaller and smaller, mentally!
The wester society, on the other hand is taking a different approach, they support their friends and family members in things they do (of course not criminal activities!) This is how people build confident, step forward and see the sunshine in their face. Be it they fail, the family and friends continue to be supportive, by giving word of encouragement like "It is ok! You are going to be fine next time." These word of loves, help them to stand up and continue to venture into the life journey.
Ok, so what is this have to do with the yesterday post? I remember one guy in the show said that his Mama encouraged him to go for the contest. You see, if this is in Asia, the Mama will be like, "You crazy-ah? Want to show your already embarrasing asset to embarrass youself more? No! No! You cannot go! Later you Uncle, Auntie and our neighbour know about it, I don't have face to go pasar (market) again!"
And then I remembered watching the interview on cable TV when I was in the States. The Playboy playmate was answering the interviewer question, saying that she wanted to give thanks to her Mom for giving her the support when she was doubting over whether or not to post nude for Playboy. And yes, that decision to be the playmate made her famous. Shall the Mom reacted like a asian Mom, she will not have been who she is today.
posted at 1:07 AM
4 Comments:
Yeah, the thinkings here is different.
People here are still more conservative.
Talking about this reminds me of the recent hot topic regarding the "public display of affection in Msia", whereby a couple were charged with indecent behaviour for hugging and kissing in a park.
*shake head*
Apples and oranges do not compare well ...
Each society creates and executes its own set of rules - good, bad or anything else in between.
Ask ourselves this (ref: Borneo lifestyle):
- Is a woman appearing in public bare breasted guilty of "indecent exposure", or is it OK since she is just practising age-old traditional custom?
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